Decluttering plan

After seperating most of the stuff I own, I realized I'm not the only hoarder in the house. We have so much crap in this place! And being the youngest (I live with my parents and brother) it feels weird that I'm the one taking notice and actually doing something about it. Usually it's a parent, isn't it?

People are always on about not having enough space, but those very same people probably also never have enough anything. Not enough clothes, not enough shoes, not enough purses, food, new electronics/gadgets etc. Well, you can always earn more money, so you can pay for more space and then earn some more money and get some more stuff and then keep doing that over and over again!

Or you break the vicious circle and start an uplifting spiral!
Get rid of stuff
--> have less to worry about > have more rest/peace at mind > more time to spend and think about things that you enjoy or that actually matter to you
--> have more space > have more room to do things > move more > get healthier?
--> out of sight, out of mind > the neatness of no clutter will calm you down in a way you probably didn't even know you were stressed about

And so forth.
Anyway, here is my plan:

1. Pick two rooms.
   One with a lot of room, that you use frequently (like the livingroom) and one you don't really "use". Everybody has one. Whether you store stuff in it or put all your crap in; you don't really use it. You don't go in there like for a long time, just to grab or dump something.
   
2. Empty and divide.
   Get everything out of the unused room (will be refered to as crap-room from now on) and put it in the big room.
   Now go through all of the stuff and seperate it into piles:
   
   • Keeps: anything you really use/need on a daily basis or frequently (e.g. at parties), important papers, stuff with REAL memories/sentimental value etc.
   • Non-keeps: to sell, give away, donate, gifts
   • Throw away/Recycle: evident. Actually throw away/recycle at the end of your tidying session.
   • Don't know/Maybe: try not to create this pile at all, but if you do; keep it as small as possible by deciding right away.
   There's need to subdivide them right away, but if you want/can; it's only easier. If you have large things you want to get rid of, like furniture, just mark it (e.g. with an easily removable sticker)
   
3. Re-place.
   Put all the stuff that you're not going to keep in the crap-room. (Try to) give everything you're going to keep a place right away ór leave it in the big room.
4. Continue.
   Now you go on to the next room and repeat step 2 and 3. Only now, you put everything you're going to keep back in the original room (except if it doesn't belong there, of course) instead of leaving it in the big room (if that's what you did previously). Go through every room, cabinet, closet, box, storage space etc. and put all the non-keeps in the non-keeps room.
5. Get your hands dirty.
   If you haven't already subdivided the crap, do that now.
   
   • Put everything you're going to donate in a bag or box or something and put it somewhere in your way, so that you don't forget it. Also put it on your to do list, in your planner, on your calendar or anywhere else to remind yourself. OR just go and get rid of it right away.
     
   • Contact people. Make one-on-one appointments with people you have gifts to give to. Also organise a 'give away party': have people come over to take your crap away to their home. Also let them know about the stuff you want to sell; you might just get rid of some stuff right away!
     
   • Make appointments with second hand (furniture) stores. Alternatively, you can take pictures of everything you want to sell and put it online (ebay?).
     
6. Redo your home.
   Now, you own your stuff again, instead of being posessed by your stuff. Now you can make your house back into a home.

~! WARNING !~
This usually takes much longer than it sounds.
It can take weeks, but more likely months or perhaps even years.

The redoing of le room.

So, I've FINALLY built up enough courage and suspense and mental preparation to do this. My room is le changing!

To do this, I got everything out of my gigantic desk, which I had been using as a storage space. Another reason I emptied it, is because I plan on getting rid of it. In the seven years of having it, I've never used it in it's intended purpose. That is, until a couple of weeks ago, after it was completely empty, of course.

The gutted beast:

And all of my stuff, also things from outside of my room (except clothing and footwear), is on the floor, neatly stacked up and put against the walls. Yes walls. Plural.

Piles of stuffs against walls:

Right now I'm deviding everything into other piles; keeps and non-keeps. Most sites and people suggest three piles: keep, throw away, give away. But since I recycle and I don't have a magic recyclebin in my room that will take everything to its destined container, I'm not really going to make a throw away pile. Everything that's actually trash goes right into the bin anyway and everything that's not trash and I'm not keeping has some sort of destination. Whether it be a book I need to return to a friend; CDRoms from my old high school; game devices/electronics I know a certain store will appreciate; toys nieces and nephews might like; paper or plastic that needs to be recyled; things I'm going to sell or whatever else: it all has some sort of destination.

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I just realized how much Holland takes after Uncie SAmerica. How they have baseball cards, we have soccercards. Oyea. I found some in my room, though I never collected them (my mother gets them when she goes groceryshopping).
I also found a thin stack of Yu-Gi-Oh! cards, which I also never collected. And a thick pile of Pokémon cards. Never collected those either (I'm not much of a card-collector, can you tell? I always saw right through the scam), but I got them from a friend back in elementary school. I'm happier to have them now than I was back then, cause my Pokémon fan-ness has grown considerably.

Cards

Even though I'm not a card-collector, I did/do collect the most ridiculous stuff. I just found a little tin with a couple of soap bars in it. That's right: SOAP BARS. And you might think; eh, sure whatever? But I remember actually wanting to collect soapies. How is that not the most dumb thing you've ever heard?! And yet I feel a part of myself being insulted right now, trying to justify it, but I'm not even going to listen to the stupid things it has to say. I usually do, but no. Not this time. STFU BRAIN, YOU'RE INSANE! I'm just glad I didn't somehow find (cause I wouldn't actually go out and buy it of course) any more random soap or it actually might have continued to become a real collection.

Random soap:

And I have a collection of bags. And I don't mean purse-bags or backpacks or something, I mean bags like, grocery shoppers or shopping bags from stores. And bunch of old broken pens and other stuff that's actually junk. But I'm thinking of a way to turn them into art somehow.

The reason I can't just throw it away is that I don't think people hoard for no reason. The thought I've heard everyone has is "I might use it some day!" or something along those lines. Well, since no opportunity has arisen on it's own, I'll make it happen. Unfortunately I'm not an inventor, so I can't make the stuff into something useful, but the least I can do is turn it into art. It'll be quite a big project and I feel the excitement about it bubbling inside me, though my mind is still blank as to what I can make of it.

I have a ridiculous lot of magazines (although I've heard of much much worse magazine-keepers). Those too will become a project.
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I just found some random 'dare' cards I made years ago.
- Keep your eyes open as long as possible.
- Pick someone. Do whatever they dare you to do.
- Do a summersault.
- Do a bridge (backbend).
- Make monkey sounds.
- Lose a game on purpose.
- Get tickled. Do you laugh? You fail: do another dare.
- Do any kind of split or get another dare.
- Do a handstand or get another dare.
- Act like a fish
- Real quickly name 6 animals
- Bonus: get as much clutter from the house in 2 minutes.

Here, I'll do the first one:

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I'm getting there, little by little. I'm definitely realizing the importance of quick execution. And I don't just mean deciding something quickly, but also in the sense of 'getting rid of' something quickly. Because, the longer you still have something around, the bigger the chance is that you'll rethink it and get back at your descision. I should get rid of all this stuff asap.

Most of the stuff I want to keep is for the treasure chest I'm going to purchase. It's all a bunch of memorabilia and stuff I don't really have any use for, but can't get rid of either: diplomas, certificates, my elementary school graduation stuff, my babybook, old pasports and cards (passes), pictures, letters and cards (greeting cards), certain gifts, old school projects/papers (cause I'm an emotional duntz; I can't get rid of it), school organisers/planners/diaries/journals/whatever you want to call it, 'friend books'... Actually pretty much anything I can't, won't or is too valueble to hang up on my wall!

My wall the last time I took a picture of it:

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I have come quite far today! To any unknowing eye it will probably seem like I only moved some stuff around and made a bunch of piles of crap into a less high mess. But I know exactly what's what. The only problem I'm having is figuring out where to keep the stuff for future-projects.

I don't really want to stop, but I'm kinda walking into a wall here. I might continue after a little break, maybe it'll go better after I eat some and watch some of my downloads.

Flyer van mams... ¬¬

PUBERS
In de puberteit


Pubers kunnen heel verfrissend
en ontwapenend zijn. Ze laten je
nadenken over de manier waarop
je opvoeder wilt zijn, over je
levensstijl, je uiterlijk, je smaak.
Van pubers valt veel te genieten,
net zoals van kinderen in een
eerdere ontwikkelingsfase.

Maar de puberteit kan ook
spanningen en conflicten met zich
meebrengen, want pubers kunnen
soms onredelijk zijn, humeurig of
dwars.
Daardoor kan het opvoeden in
deze periode ook lastig zijn.


TIPS TIPS TIPS

Toeschouwer
Kijk naar je puber niet alleen als opvoeder,
maar ook als toeschouwer. Zo kun je beter
zien hoe je kind volwassen probeert te
worden en kun je ook trots op hem zijn.

Geen preek
Toon belangstelling voor het reilen en
zeilen van je puber zonder meteen klaar
te staan met je eigen mening. Dat wordt al
gauw een 'preek' en dat is wel het laatste
waar je kind behoefte aan heeft.

Experimenteren
Realiseer je dat veel van wat je puber
doet experimenteren is, het opdoen van
ervaringen om te ontdekken wat hij of zij
kan of wil, wat bij hem of haar past.
De meeste experimenten houden na een
tijdje weer op.

Normen en waarden
Hou vast aan de normen en waarden
die jij belangrijk vindt, ook al heeft je puber
de behoefte er flink tegenaan te schoppen.
Probeer duidelijk te maken waarom je
eraan hecht, maar dring ze niet op.

Verbieden
Al zou je misschien iets liever willen, je
puber iets verbieden (ik verbied je met die
jongen om te gaan, een stickie te roken, te
drinken) heeft geen zin. Je riskeert hooguit
dat hij of zij het juist gaat doen, maar dan
stiekem.

Kind van de buren
Als je even niet meer weet wat je met je
puber aan moet, probeer je dan voor te
stellen dat het om het kind van de buren
gaat. Dan komen de goede ideeën vanzelf.

Duidelijke regels
Maak alleen duidelijke regels bij wat je echt
belangrijk vindt. Op tijd de hond uitlaten kan
belangrijker zijn dan het geven van een zoen
voor het slapen gaan. Het scheelt een hoop
geruzie en bovendien laat je je puber zo meer
in zijn waarde.

Spannend
De puberteit is spannend en niet per se
een bron van zorg. Als je het zo bekijkt, zit je
al aardig op dezelfde golflengte als je puber.

Onderhandelen
Onderhandel samen over regels en
grenzen. Dat is de beste manier om
ruzies te vermijden of op te lossen.
Bovendien maakt je puber zo kennis met
geven en nemen.
Onderhandelen kan over alles:
zakgeld, kamer opruimen, roken, drinken,
hoe laat thuis komen, noem maar op.

Two cute little mice!

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( ';' ) (';' )
-(. )- -('.')-
I I II

Two cute little mice!

( ),,( ) ( ),( )
( ';' ) (';' )
-(. )- -('.')-
I I II

Een vreemde manier van leven?

Laatst ontmoette ik op een bruiloft een neef, die ik in jaren niet had gezien. We raakten aan de praat. Hij vertelde hoe hij op dit moment leeft.
Vreemd! Hij had gekozen om in armoede te leven. Vrijwillig gekozen armoede. Hj beweerde dat hij daar gelukkig van werd. Samen met drie vrouwen woont hij in een klein arbeidershuisje in de Indische Buurt in Amsterdam. Met een klein baantje verdienen zij een beetje geld. Daarvan leven zij en betalen zij de huur. Ze hebben een huiskamer ingericht voor prostituees, die met tippelen hun geld verdienen. Geld dat zij vaak nodig hebben voor drugs. Van zulke vrouwen en meisjes zijn er nogal wat in Amsterdam, vertelde hij. Ze zijn, volgens hem, praktisch vogelvrij. Soms hebben ze een 'vriend', die hen steeds ook weer 'de baan' opstuurt.
"Verder hebben ze niemand", zei Kees. "Werkelijk niemand". Hoerenlopers en dealers maken misbruik van hen, buurtbewoners jagen hen weg, de gemeente wil er officieel niks mee te maken hebben. Iedereen ziet deze vrouwen als een probleem dat zo gauw mogelijk uitgebannen moet worden. Er zijn maar weinig mensen, die deze vrouwen ook als mens ziet. Als een mens, die in de problemen zit."
Dat vertelde Kees allemaal. Die groep van hem biedt die vrouwen een veilige, warme plek om te schuilen, soep en brood, een douche, wat menselijke aandacht en warmte.
"Hoe kun je daar nou gelukkig van worden?", vroeg ik.
"Dat lijkt me juist vragen om inbrekers!", reageerde ik.
"Nee hoor. Iedereen mag en kan gewoon binnenkomen om een boterham te nemen, een groet achter te laten, een nachtje te slapen. En dat gebeurt ook vaak.
Kijk, er is niets te halen van materiële waarde. Zodoende hebben we veel kostelijke ontmoetingen gehad. Ja, en als er eens iemand iets uit ons huis meenam, dan dachten we: 'Die zal het wel harder nodig gehad hebben dan wij'. We zijn er heel tevreden mee."
Nou was ik zelf op dat moment verwikkeld in een akelige erfeniskwestie die mijn bloed liet koken. Ik was daar vol van. Dus ik vertelde hem daarover. Mijn vader was een paar jaar geleden gestorven. Mijn drie broers werkten in het bedrijf van mijn vader. Ik zelf ben een heel andere kant op gegaan. Ik geef les aan een havo. Na de dood van mijn vader -mijn moeder was al eerder gestorven- wilden mijn broers zijn geld, dat hij allemaal in dat bedrijf had zitten, in het bedrijf laten.
Als ze mij mijn deel van de erfenis zouden geven dan zou het bedrijf over de kop gaat. Ik zou toch ook wel willen dat op die manier het levenswerk van mijn vader zou worden voortgezet, dachten zij...
Nou, dat wilde ik ook wel, maar ik vond dat ze dan maar dat geld bij een bank moesten lenen en mij mijn deel van de erfenis moesten geven. Dat wilden ze niet. En er was ook niks per testament geregeld door mijn vader. Dus, ik overwoog om dan maar naar de rechter te stappen om mijn recht te halen. Dan riskeerde ik natuurlijk wel een breuk met mijn familie. Enfin, pesterijen over en weer, je kent dat wel. Bitterheid alom...
Zegt Kees tegen mij: "Zijn die rotcenten je dat allemaal waard? Waarom zie je er niet gewoon vanaf je recht te halen? Dat is toch veel beter voor je gemoedsrust. Laat toch lopen man! Wat zal je je al die ellende op je nek halen voor honderdvijftigduizend gulden? Ik laat me nog niet voor een miljoen ongelukkig maken ... Dat is toch je ziel aan de duivel verkopen!"
Nou ja, wat vind je daar nu van?

What is love...

according to children ages 4-8?


'When my grandmother got arthritis,
she couldn't bend over and paint her toenails anymore.
So my grandfather does it for her all the time,
even when his hands got arthritis too. That's love.'
Rebecca - age 8


'When someone loves you, the way they say your name is different.
You just know that your name is safe in their mouth.'
Billy - age 4


'Love is when a girl puts on perfume
and a boy puts on shaving cologne
and they go out and smell each other.'
Karl - age 5


'Love is when you go out to eat
and give somebody most of your French fries
without making them give you any of theirs.'
Chrissy - age 6


'Love is what makes you smile when you're tired.'
Terri - age 4


'Love is when my mommy makes coffee for my daddy
and she takes a sip before giving it to him, to make sure the taste is OK.'
Danny - age 7


'Love is when you kiss all the time.
Then when you get tired of kissing,
you still want to be together and you talk more.
My mommy and daddy are like that.
They look gross when they kiss'
Emily - age 8


'Love is what's in the room with you at Christmas
if you stop opening presents and listen.'
Bobby - age 7 (Wow!)


'If you want to learn to love better,
you should start with a friend who you hate,'
Nikka - age 6
(we need a few million more Nikka's on this planet)


'Love is when you tell a guy you like his shirt,
then he wears it everyday.'
Noelle - age 7


'Love is like a little old woman and a little old man who are still friends
even after they know each other so well.'
Tommy - age 6


'During my piano recital, I was on a stage and I was scared.
I looked at all the people watching me
and saw my daddy waving and smiling.
He was the only one doing that.
I wasn't scared anymore.'
Cindy - age 8


'My mommy loves me more than anybody
You don't see anyone else kissing me to sleep at night.'
Clare - age 6


'Love is when mommy gives daddy the best piece of chicken.'
Elaine-age 5


'Love is when mommy sees daddy smelly and sweaty
and still says he is handsomer than Robert Redford.'
Chris - age 7


'Love is when your puppy licks your face even after you left him alone all day..'
Mary Ann - age 4


'I know my older sister loves me
because she gives me all her old clothes
and has to go out and buy new ones.'
Lauren - age 4


'When you love somebody, your eyelashes go up and down
and little stars come out of you.' (what an image)
Karen - age 7


'You really shouldn't say 'I love you', unless you mean it.
But if you mean it, you should say it a lot.. People forget.'
Jessica - age 8


And the final one:
a four year old child whose next door neighbor
was an elderly gentleman who had recently lost his wife.

Upon seeing the man cry,
the little boy went into the old gentleman's yard,
climbed onto his lap, and just sat there.

When his mother asked what he had said to the neighbor,
the little boy said: 'Nothing, I just helped him cry'